Through this article, we will learn what factors we should keep in mind at the time of punishing our children. Most of the times parents cannot control their emotions and angriness, and they discipline their children more than they deserve. So here are the recommendations from child psychologists how to deal with the situations.
A child should not get punished if he did not have bad intentions.
Children do not try to harm anyone most of the time. Sometimes they do some acts not to hurt anyone but to discover things. We should support our children when they are trying to learn something if they will act badly. They do something not with the wrong intentions to harm anybody. We should sympathize with our children and should tell them how to do it in the right way.
Orders and suggestions are different things
Do not make requests and suggestions the same for the children. There is a lot of difference between “Do not play games” and “Maybe, you should not play games?” The first one is an order and the second one is a suggestion. You should punish your children only when you have ordered them to do or not to do things. You should not punish them for the tips you give them. A sensitive child will follow all the orders because he is scared of the consequences.
The punishment you give to the child should not be emotional
Some parents get very angry with their children if they do not obey them even if they love their children very much. They get mad because they expect a lot from their children. When children do not offer their parents as they want then parents become unsatisfied.
Your child may have problems in the future if he is easily impressionable. According to psychologists, your child may be dependent on them who have a high social status.
Do not give punishment in public
If you punish your child in society, your child feels embarrassed and angry. Do not use the phrase “What will others say” for your child. It is the same thing when your child gets rewarded in public.
When you punish your child in public, he feels humiliated and also expects the same to happen again in the same way. If it continuously happens, they will depend on the majority’s views in their adult life, and they will be afraid to make their own decisions for their survival.
You should punish if you threatened to punish
If you threaten your child that you will punish him if he does the wrong things, then you should punish him. If you only threaten your only rather than punishing, it is a bad thing. In this way, your children think that you say words but do not do anything so they will stop trusting you.
Punish everyone, when you do not know who is guilty
If you do not know who is guilty among many children, then do not punish only one child, instead, punish all of them. And if your child is with his friend, do not criticize the other children at all. If your child is with his brothers and sisters, then you should punish everyone.
If you punish only one child, then he will be damaged and in future will become a scapegoat. And other children may repeat the same mistake.
You should punish the children only for current wrongdoings, not for the past ones.
A child does not become a healthy person if you punish him always for his past mistakes. They will scare to do new things. They will not be able to learn from their own mistakes. According to child psychologists, you should punish your child if your child did something wrong a long time ago and you come to know. Rather than punishing you should explain to your child that they did it wrong.
The punishment you give should be according to their age and hobbies
Do not provide a significant penalty for small things. The punishment for the bad grades and a broken window should not be the same. Take the child’s age and preferences into consideration while giving them a penalty. If your child loves social media then punish him by limiting the usage time of social media.
Do not use wrong and offensive words to children
When people are very emotional, it happens. Most parents do not notice what they do. Use essential vocabulary to your child. Sensitive children may memorize the counting when their mother and father have used bad words from them. So parents should be careful regarding this.